Friday, July 11, 2008

Talk Me In Off The Ledge !

Talk Me In Off The Ledge !

On Tuesday, January 15th, Fox Sports will be broadcasting the MLB All-Star Game at Yankee Stadium.

Since it’s on FOX, the broadcasters will probably be Joe “tragically un-hip” Buck, and Tim “can you tell I still have deep psychological issues, related to being fired by the Mets ?” McCarver.

Buck & McCarver are FOX’s solution to insomnia. If God is reading this, please help me fall asleep by 7:59:59 EST on Tuesday, and I will be thankful.

What will I miss if I fall asleep by 7:59:59 EST ?

The over/under of Bob Gibson being mentioned 5 times by Buck & McCarver, both huge St. Louis Cardinals' fans.

Buck & McCarver waxing poetic about Yankee Stadium (I feel breakfast coming back up through my esophagus, as I write this).

Hank Steinbrenner using the opportunity of a national showcase, to create a Who’s Who in Yankees’ history, being shown in person, at Yankee Stadium.

Willie Randolph making an appearance at Yankee Stadium, and being showered with love, at Yankee Stadium, giving Hank unparalled glee, while driving a stake into the hearts of Mets’ fans.

Quotes such as… "This final All-Star Game at Yankee Stadium is what the stadium is about -- memories." -- Phil Niekro

Trying to guess what color Tim McCarver’s hair will be – seriously, Rust-Oleum and the Crayola 64-pack, with the crayon sharpener in the back, don’t even have this color.

God willing, I will be asleep by 7:59:59 EST, because the potential of listening to Buck & McCarver, is about as enticing as receiving a root canal without anesthesia, or a barium enema, with battery acid.

Talk me in folks, I'm on the ledge...


metsfan73 said...

Nice. Let's see how many times they will refer to Jeter, Bucky Dent's HR, Reggie's three HR's in '77,...gag me with the Triboro Bridge. They might as well carry it on the YES network.
Wouldn't it be nice if Jeter's knee explodes, and A-Rod boots a ball at 3B, while humming 'Like A Virgin' to lose the game to the NL?

dave said...

Hilarious. I'm glad to see someone hates McCarver (and his hair) as much as I do.

Don't forget about the over emphasis on "This Game Counts!"

build the farm system said...

Thanks, Dave !

I forgot about "This Game Counts!"

I wish the game was at Fenway, the PA announcer could play Madonna records, every time ARod walked from the on-deck circle to home plate. It would be hilarious.