Thursday, March 11, 2010

Carlos, Kelvim, Jose…You Can’t Make This Stuff Up




No matter what you might think, this isn’t revisionist history. I had a good feeling that Carlos Beltran would need surgery to his ailing right knee. I have no problem that he got it taken care of prior to the season. I don’t even care if he misses the first month of the season. I want him healthy come the meaningful games in June…uh, September. We all had problems with the lack of communication between Beltran’s reps and the Mets, or most likely more accurately, Omar’s comprehension of the situation. No big deal, it’s a long season, and I think we all would like a healthy Carlos coming down the stretch.

The newly acquired Kelvim Escobar, now that is a little different. We all knew he had major shoulder troubles that limited him to the proverbial cup of coffee in the pros over the last two seasons. But, the Mets did sign him only to find out that his shoulder is shot, and he might have to entertain thoughts of retiring. Holy Victor Zambrano Batman!

I realize Escobar was signed to a minor league deal, and in all fairness to the Mets developmentally delayed upper management, Escobar seemed like a low risk deal. The warning signs should have been when Kelvim himself saw his role as a reliever, not a starter. The Mets could have used another starter instead of a cornucopia of less accomplished pitchers. Right now the only problem is if Escobar is preventing a younger player from being on the 40 man roster.

Onto Jose: am I worried about Jose? Not really. I think his medical problem, a hyperactive thyroid, is very treatable. As with Beltran, it’s better that he misses the first month or so of the season than the last month of the season. Understood. The problem, once again, is that they have some big holes to fill with the likes of Angel Pagan/Gary Matthews Jr, Alex Cora/Ruben Tejada. Nomar is available, isn’t he?

The injuries hurt (no pun intended). But, what hurts more is that the Mets “have a failure to communicate.” *

Can you imagine the conversations that Omar and the Mets have had with their players? It might have gone something like this:

Beltran: Omar, this knee is killing me, and I really need to get it checked out. My doctors are telling me I have to have surgery if I have any hopes of playing this year and beyond.

Omar: Have you tried ibuprofen? Alleve? Chicken soup? These are all proven methods for curing aches and pains…as well as the common cold.

Beltran: Huh? Omar, I have no cartilage in my knee. I should have had it operated on last summer, but I listened to you, and now , MY DOCTOR is saying I must have surgery.

Omar: Have you tried an ACE Bandage? I hear they do wonders. Maybe

some Ben Gay, that used to work when my muscles were aching after getting knocked down daily by the NY media.

Beltran: I’m having the surgery.

Omar: Have you consulted Dr. Jeff Wilpon?

Beltran: See you in May Omar.

Click

With Jose, it was a little different. Omar was on the right page, but our aloof SS seemed to have gotten his medical information from someone who is not a doctor, but plays one on TV…

I think it might have gone something like this:

ESPN Deportes: So Jose, how are you feeling, and when do you expect to be back with the club?

Jose: I feel great. There is nothing wrong with my hamstring or my thyroid. I feel great. I expect to be back with Los Mets by Saturday.

ESPN Deportes: The Mets are saying they are awaiting results from your latest blood tests, and that you will be out at least a week due to the hyperactive thyroid issue. Are we incorrect is assuming that?

Jose: Si’. I am fine. I consulted with my agent and Dr. K, you know he played for the Mets once – and the Doc said I look great, which I do, so that means I can play.

ESPN Deportes: Dr. K?

Jose: Yes, Dr. K. He was an amazing player - became a doctor while he was still playing baseball. He earned the doctor thing when he was 19! He would have 50,000 patients waiting to see him. Now, if that isn’t a great doctor, I don’t know what is.


ESPN Deportes: I’m speechless.

Jose: So was I when I got the diagnosis…

You just can’t make this stuff up. Now, before all of you fans who think that I don’t appreciate and adore Reyes the ballplayer, you are sadly mistaking. I love the guy. But, if we can’t laugh at the insanity of how this once proud organization is run, we will surely be only 24 Hours From Suicide.

* Cool Hand Luke

1 comment:

Long Island Met Fan said...

see whats wrong with a little humor!!!! Great stuff Can i add a line from Omar..."with that being said Jose should be back with the team in 2-8 weeks but we are still waiting on tests from Dr K"